Sunday, August 30, 2009

So Easy a Caveman can do It




I found a new webcomic called "Partially Clips". It's hilarious.



I love the Geico Caveman commercials. I know they've been around forever, but they're still funny. The ad campaign hasn't stagnated and lost the creativity, it's still the same joke, but it's continuously done well. Like the bowling commercial where the caveman hits a strike and the pin clearer comes down and it says Geico. Maybe it's because we can all sympathize with the cavemen because their "Geico sign" is that annoying thing in our lives that keeps showing up everywhere we go. It's like right after you get bit by a dog, there are dogs everywhere all of a sudden, or after a breakup, you see your ex all over. I say, keep up the cavemen, but I'd like to see it get more ridiculous. A caveman takes a girls shirt shirt off and she's wearing a Geico bra. Or, they go on vacation to Mexico to get away from everything and the Geico gecko shows up. And then that techno music starts playing and those eyes are staring at them....



I'm trying to think of something that went from out of control awesome to marginally terrible as much as Heroes did. The first season was so well written and addicting. After watching the 2nd and half of the 3rd season, it kinda killed the series for me. This was probably an idea someone had kicking around in his head for a while and then realized how awesome it was. The problem came in when they were expected to produce a second season. The quality planning and plot ran out at the end of the first season. Kinda like Club Dread after Super Troopers.



And seriously girls, when you get married, keep your maiden name somewhere on your facebook name. Julie 'Smith' Reed is completely fine. We can see that you got married, and then I can still remember who you are. High school was a long time ago, and honestly, everyone has gained a lot of weight.



Wouldn't it be cool if I could just play some 80's music and read my notes in different positions and then learn everything in just 2 minutes? Someone needs to create the "Study Montage" so I have more free time on the weekends...

Monday, August 24, 2009

What's the Year Again?

"I was born back in '84"
"Remember back in '97 when we went down to Florida?"
"I was in the class of '03"
"We're trying to have all hybrid busses by '10"

That last one just doesn't sound right. I don't know if it's the monosyllabacy (that's totally a word) or maybe just because it's new. This seems like kinda a big deal. A few months from now we're all going to start using an awkward year convention. Maybe just saying "2010" will be the answer, and it sounds more futuristic, so that's a plus.



Zoolander may be the greatest movie in the past 20 years. Contributing to that is the scene towards the end where Maury is telling Mugatu that he has everything backed up on his computer. He lays down the trump card with "I have two words for you: Zip Disk!" Anyone that's under 20 is going to think "What's a Zip Disk?" I love how they were supposed to be the next big thing and were replaced within a year. However, Zoolander solidified their place in esoteric reference history. "I have words for you: Sega Saturn!"



Alright, why does the WNBA still exist? I don't mean to downplay the talent of the women or women's sports in general, but are they making ANY money? It's like watching little league when there's a perfectly good baseball game on another channel. And as much as I hate summer due to the lack of sports, I still have no interest in watching mediocre basketball. Some things are great breakthroughs when they first start, but then need to die.
After writing all that, here's a fun quote from the WNBA wiki page: "Finance

So far the WNBA has not mirrored the monetary success of the NBA, though it targets profitability. While some teams do make a profit (and others break even), most of the teams in the WNBA lose money each season. Losses are subsidized by the NBA; in 2003, news surfaced that the NBA spent up to $12 million a year to help pay for the WNBA losses but no recent article has been published with updated numbers since then.

However, in a March 12, 2009 article, NBA commissioner David Stern said that in the bad economy, "the NBA is far less profitable than the WNBA. We're losing a lot of money amongst a large number of teams. We're budgeting the WNBA to break even this year." [10]"

That's kinda like a guy at the World Series of Poker losing $2 million on the last hand and the woman playing penny slots in the back piping up "But I only lost $40!"



Now that I'm taking Pharm this year, my spam e-mail just became a minefield. My professor could be e-mailing me all sorts of drug offers. Just because "New drug promises EXTREME weight-loss" is the subject line, doesn't mean it's not legitimate. However, I would like to avoid any creepy e-mails from my professor promising to enlarge my penis. (Please save your 'small penis' remarks for the comments section.)



It seems like every year we go over some ridiculous concept that I can't believe they're actually presenting to a group of medical students. "This is the structure of an antibody." WHY would you need to show us that?
(That was for all the nerds who love puns.)

Thursday, August 20, 2009

And We're Back

Remember how in 1st grade you go out and get your notebooks and pencils two weeks before school started? I think I grabbed a random binder I had in my room the morning before my first class. My back to school shopping consisted of me looking around my room and removing notes from last year.



Have you seen those commercials for Bing.com? They remind me of the Snuggie commercials. You don't use Bing and all of a sudden you start banging on your keyboard like a monkey on amphetamines.

"What movies are playing?"
"Movies, films, filmstrip, vacation photos, vacation spots in Mexico, Montezuma's Revenge, diarrhea."

Seriously? Who can't do a Google search and not end up with nothing related to your topic? Yeah, there's crap out there, but it's not like Google gives you random crap, it's actually pretty accurate. That all being said, I tried out Bing and it was comparable.



As much as I miss football season, I'm still pretty undecided about preseason football. It's like a strip club in that it's kinda what you want, but it's never as good as the real thing. The one part I do like is the 'televised job interview' aspect of it. Especially after the first two strings are taken out, you know the guys on the field aren't on the team for sure yet. Every time a pass hits a wide open receiver in the hands, I have to wonder if his wife is at home screaming, "Dammit! You either catch that ball or you're working at Wal-Mart!" Because you know he's not qualified for anything else...



Also, I'm happy that everyone finally turned against Brett Favre. I hated him before it was cool, but I'm happy to have you all on my side. And the worst part? I really thought he was gone this year. That was an extra slap in the face. "Oh, his shoulder is torn and he wasn't going to operate on it. Ok, that has to be it." And then all this. I do like the storyline for when they play the Packers, but I can't imagine wanting to ever turn on ESPN that week. All I'm gonna see is purple and green. I'd throw in some simile, but NOTHING is purple and green. The best part? This shirt.



I have a new favorite chemical compound: Peroxynitrite. It's chemical formula is ONOO-. "OH NOOOOOOOOOO!" You know, because it causes cancer.